Seen Ways, Counted Steps

On my lunch break.

I just had some really good sweet and sour chicken from Healthy Choice. I have lost a total of 15 pounds since January! Go me!

I'm in the Director's Office training again. Wondering if I'm really going to be able to handle all of this formality and what-not. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

I bought Casting Crown's latest cd Until the Whole World Hears yesterday off Walmart.com. I am an avid promoter of walmart.com mp3 downloads, now. They're pretty awesome. Anyway, I've never been a big fan of Casting Crowns. I've never been a big fan of contemporary Christian music, honestly. I love Praise & Worship - I'm all for Hillsong and JesusCulture and Brian and Jenn Johnson. But so much Contemporary Christian music blends together and sounds the same to me. BUT, Casting Crowns' songs always tug at my heartstrings when I happen upon one on 90.7 Way Radio. I can tell just by the conviction I get my listening to their music that it is prayed over. It's not just a job for them. They're not just expressing their artistic talents.

There is one song that is right where I am spiritually right now...or, at least, where I'm attempting to be. I'm calling myself free, even though I don't feel free. And I'm saying that I'm laying all of my shame, nervousness, stress, pain...all of this bad stuff down at the cross, even though I don't feel like I really can. With God I can do anything.

Here at Your feet, I lay my past down
My wanderings, all my mistakes down
And I am free

Here at Your feet, I lay this day down
Not in my strength, but in Yours I’ve found
All I need, You’re all I need

Jesus, Jesus, at Your feet
Oh, to dwell and never leave
Jesus, Jesus, at Your feet
There is nowhere else for me
There is nowhere else for me

Here at Your feet, I lay my future down
All of my dreams, I give to You now
And I find peace, I find peace
Here at Your feet, I lay my life down
For You my King, You’re all I want now
And my soul sings…

‘Cause I am free (here at Your feet)
All I need (is at Your feet)
I find peace
We’re at Your feet
We’re at Your feet

And I am free (here at Your feet)
All I need (is at Your feet)
I find peace
We’re at Your feet
We’re at Your feet
We’re at Your feet
We’re at Your feet

Here at Your feet
I lay my life down


Whenever I hear a song like this that I can relate to so well, I so very much want to sing it in church. I guess because I know that if I had the opportunity to sing this I would mean it on a different level then if I sang something about dancing, etc.

I messed up bad yesterday. I let my stupid mouth get away with me and blurted out something about someone that was true, but I shouldn't have said anything. I immediately was convicted, which I was thankful for. I am glad I can still be convicted. The problem is, satan has this habit of trying to make me beat myself up about my mistakes...to the point that I wonder what the point of trying is anymore. Which isn't the way it's supposed to be. So, I told myself that I would start over. I would try again, and maybe do better tomorrow.